So after last nights ‘adventures’ and lack of sleep. Man-child declared that he would be fine to go to work. In fact, mere minutes after the ambulance had left he had decided that if he didn’t need to go to the hospital NOW, then he didn’t even need to go to the doctor at all. I hoped that it was just a passing comment but no, he got up and went to work this morning. I couldn’t believe it, work potentially being the cause for or at least a major contributing factor in the drama that unfolded.
Despite my snide remarks that it made more sense to go to work and exacerbate the problem rather than going to the doctor he continued to work, stating that he might try and go to the doctor later in the day, as long as the appointment didn’t interrupt too much work! GAH – drive me insane, it is great to see where a person’s priorities lie.
Naturally by lunch time, an appointment still hadn’t been made and I was forced to play dirty – do you really want to be a burden on our kids the way that your dad is a burden on you? I didn’t want to do it but I really don’t want to spend the rest of my life sitting around watching the man I love kill himself slowly and whilst he is doing it, doing irrevocable damage to those around him. I felt horrible saying it, but I knew it was the only thing to stir up a response and eventually an appointment was made for tomorrow morning.
I know it sounds ruthless and cruel and rounds out the picture I paint of myself being a heartless wench but I don’t want to be married to my father in law. He is a rude, selfish, arrogant man who let his ‘secret’ dependance upon alcohol ruin his life and damage the lives of is family. Now he is old and alone and still rude, selfish and arrogant. One day I will actually write the true story of the ‘outlaws’ and my relationship with them, but for now I will just pray that I don’t become like them.
I love my family and I will do anything to protect them and keep them all safe, even if it means turning up the heatless wench persona a notch or two. Fingers crossed that the report from the doctor will be reassuring and that perfect health is nothing more than a lifestyle change, healthier eating, less drinking and generally taking better care of ourselves.
Hopefully all is well. Thanks to everyone who has called, emailed or commented.